A Return To Right Where I'm Supposed To Be

I embarked on something very out of character for me last year when I began writing Beyond Sunday Morning and then attended the She Speaks Conference. Most of you who know me, know that I am not one who likes to travel, and I am certainly nervous to be in unfamiliar situations with unfamiliar people, but last spring, God began a work, and that work took me out of my "familiarness" for a few days. I felt an unexplainable yet certain pull to attend She Speaks, and I knew it was not from myself. My husband encouraged me to try it several years ago, and I wanted no part of it.  That encouragement was a seed planted and the seed grew until last spring when God let the seed sprout into reality for me. The work He began is still not complete and I am still not sure what He has in mind for the finished product, but I have been following His lead one day at a time. 


I decided to include a repost today of the words I penned the day I left the She Speaks Conference.  God made it very clear to me that I was right where He wanted me for those few days and I recorded my thoughts while they were still fresh:

August 2, 2010

As I pack my things to return home to my comfortable surroundings, many things swirl through my mind. There have been several moments of feeling insignificant and overwhelmed while I have been here, for there are so many women here much more qualified to attend than me, and there have been one or maybe ten times I have thought "what was I thinking?". This place has been bustling with women who already speak, who already write books, there have been publishers, agents, you name it.

As I left one of my classes, a class I now know was way over my head, I was more than a little downcast and, truthfully, wanted to get in my car and come home. I wondered if I had misinterpreted His leading by coming. God, being the loving Father that He is, knew how I was feeling. He was aware that deep down inside I felt like a little girl who wanted to run home to Momma. I sat down for lunch and introduced myself to the woman already sitting there. She returned the greeting introducing herself as "Susan".

That's my mom's name.  I felt His arms embrace my heart.

Isaiah 66:13 "As a mother comforts her child, so I will comfort you."

After lunch He reminded me of the prayer room that had been set up for us to use whenever needed. I went there because I needed to feel His presence and I did the very moment I walked into that room. On the tables every woman's name was written on a piece of paper next to a specific verse that had been prayed for them. I was excited to see what was written there and I just knew He would have a special message for me.

And that He did.

In haste I wrote down all of the scripture references they had for my name, I knelt and prayed for a few moments, and then rushed off to my next class. He gave me enough strength to press on for at least one more teaching time, and the next class was much more my speed. As I listened to the teacher, I felt Him reaffirming to me that I am me. There is no one like me. He did not create me to be like any of these amazing ladies I have admired as they stand on the platform. He wants me to be me. Write what He tells me, speak His words. That's it. Just obey.

At the close of the evening I went back to my room. Just before crawling into bed, I dug out the little note I had scribbled in the prayer room. I wanted to treasure hunt the scriptures that had been prayed for me, but I didn't have to hunt at all. He had a diamond on display just for me, that could not have been placed in that room without His design.

Here is what I read:

".....and His resting place shall be glorious." Isaiah 11:10

Now, scroll up to the top of this page and read the scripture that I typed on my blog header over four months ago.

I knew in that moment I was right where I was supposed to be.

My friends, I cannot describe to you how certain I was of His presence that night and I feel that pull again as I did last spring.  I will be entering today's post in a scholarship contest and I ask two things from you, my readers and sisters in Christ:

1. Pray for His will, and His will alone to be done.
2. If you would be so kind as to post a comment today explaining why you think I should go back, I would be so thankful to you.  The scholarship judges will be reading what you have to say and will announce a winner on Monday, March 14.

It is time to register for the She Speaks Conference for 2011 and as I did last year, every time I look at the website or consider going, I get butterflies in my stomach. The idea of God using me to work for His Kingdom humbles me more than I can explain and it feels so impossible to be accomplished from within myself. As Todd and I have talked about the possibility of attending this year, we have decided that if it is God's will for me to participate in this year's experience, He will provide a way. Lysa TerKeurst with Proverbs 31 Ministries is giving away a scholarship to the 2011 She Speaks Conference and I am entering in the contest. You can learn more about the scholarship contest here and if you are interested in the She Speaks Conference for yourself, I encourage you to visit the She Speaks Conference website.  There you can read about the wonderful training and possibilities they provide for women who lead in women's ministry, speaking, or writing.   It is an amazing experience, and, yes, God can use you too.


Be blessed beyond measure today, and thank you for your friendship and support,



Royal Princess Daughter Of The King