CANNOT

The night had lingered late, stars were hung brightly in the blanket of dark.  Golden curls dangle from the little head propped restfully on the sofa's arm.  Lashed eyelids succumb to the weighted downward force, and slumber falls.

Deep restful slumber.

Undisturbed, not a care in the world, peaceful slumber.

I draw back the blanket uncovering the God-given fingers and toes, as I kiss her velvet cheek.  The rest is so deep, there is not a stir at the uncovering, nor the kiss.

Mommy arms scoop beneath her knees and around her shoulders raising her to my chest.  Still, not a stir.

Arms dangle to the sides, void of effort to grasp for safety.  Complete rest, absolute slumber.

The golden curls drape as a curtain swaying from a little neck extended over Mommy's arm.

My feet step softly across the floor making way to her room, as my eyes travel across her features, treasuring this moment of quiet observance of His needlework.  I stoop, lowering Heaven's gift to her bed.

Mommy arms withdraw from her little frame.  Another kiss is placed as I brush the locks from her flushed cheeks.

I love you. I whisper.

Still never a stir.

Complete rest.

Absolute slumber.

She was totally at rest, she never realized she was in a position of thorough trust as her arms dangled and her head was thrown back.  Yes, there have been other times I have picked up my children where they weren't at quite a deep, restful state and the have locked their hands securely around my neck so not to fall.

There have been several times over the years where my husband has unexpectedly whisked me up, my feet leaving the floor, and I have clung for dear life with my arms around his neck.  All the while I yelled - Put me down!  You're gonna drop me! Put me down! eyes pinched tight and head buried deep in his shoulder.

I must ask, which image most accurately describes me in the arms of God lately?  Until this past week, I thought it was good to cling to God for dear life, which is what I have always done.  However, this imagery taught me that, yes, I cling to Him for dear life and clinging in itself isn't a bad thing,  but to be honest my clinging has often been for fear of being dropped.  For fear of falling.

I realized I didn't trust Him enough.

I didn't trust Him enough to let His arms be my place of total rest and slumber.   I have never allowed my arms to dangle to the sides without effort to cling for safety.  My head never thrown back in complete assurance I would not be dropped. 

Why?

I don't know. 

He wants me to be at complete rest in His arms, not lacking in assurance of His ability to carry me. 

Brimming with promise that He CANNOT drop me.

Not will not.

CANNOT.

It's opposite of who He is.

No matter the uncertainty, no matter the situation, no matter my lack of control in it,  He CANNOT drop me.

And I am safe.

Resting in His arms.



Royal Princess Daughter Of The King